She was wearing a "wifebeater" with no bra, black shorts that were waaaayyyy too tight and dirty white flip flops. This was not a thin middle-aged woman, and I don't think she'd had a shower in a while from her appearance. She was the 1st person in a row of four people who were walking side by side pushing Wal- Mart shopping carts down the center of the parking lot aisle.Why do they ALWAYS walk side by side instead of in a single file line when cars are driving up and down the rows??? WHYYY, I ask! I was driving straight toward her, and as she flicked her cigarette ashes out in front of my car, (can't afford shampoo but can buy cigarettes) while I was at a complete stop, waiting for the oncoming car to pass so that I could drive around her and her posse, all I could think of was..."should I turn my white trash bitch attitude on and tell her to move her cigarette smoking, nipple hangin', greasy, dirty blonde in need of a good die job, fat ass outta the way?" I decided not to. Then....THEN...she stared me down....REALLY?? Well, you skanky, gross.....my little prayer..."give me the strength to not run her over. Then back up over her again." I didn't run her over. In fact, I didn't even say anything. I know, I know....missed opportunity, right? But her bitches could probably have taken me...too many for me to tag. :) LMAO. Hag.
Ladies, have you ever looked at yourself in the mirror and thought "who the hell is that?" That's me. Yesterday. Got out of the shower, did my hair, took off my robe to dress, realized I hadn't sprayed the back of my hair, went back into the bathroom to spray it (nude), picked up my hand mirror to see the back and realized...holy shit...that's my back and my ass...or should I say AAAAAASSSSSS. That name better suits what I saw in the mirror. What follows is the conversation I had with myself inside my head. "Ummm, excuse me, did you know that your stretch marks have stretch marks?" "NO! But...I didn't even realize that I looked like THAT..., I mean, I know I'm fat, but what have I done to myself?" "Well, you eat too much, sometimes the wrong stuff, don't exercise, come on, you know this...you're a smart lady." "Yeah, but I'm still Carolinn....a whole lotta Carolinn though." "You've got to lose this, you've got to lose this now! For health reasons, mobility reasons, to look better, feel better...think better" Wake up call answered. Let me just say...well, fill in a bunch of your own cuss words...then I'm adding....shit. Right now, where there should be motivation, all I'm feeling is tired, frustrated and disappointed in myself. Not a good combo to start a new lifestyle and embark on a weight loss program. Then, I remembered seeing a photo of Ryan Blocker. New him when he was a kid and I first started teaching...from my home town, is a band director now... He's lost 329 pounds the last couple of years. He looks fantastic. I can do this...yes, I can!
Way to go, Ryan! I'm so happy for you and proud of you. You are an inspiration to me! (Hope you don't mind me stealing your photo for my blog!)
So, again, I'm saying to myself...goodbye, fatass...hello, healthy lady! And, it starts...God help me, I do love to eat.
Hope you all are finding your inspiration for whatever you need to accomplish, and from wherever you can.
Ladies, have you ever looked at yourself in the mirror and thought "who the hell is that?" That's me. Yesterday. Got out of the shower, did my hair, took off my robe to dress, realized I hadn't sprayed the back of my hair, went back into the bathroom to spray it (nude), picked up my hand mirror to see the back and realized...holy shit...that's my back and my ass...or should I say AAAAAASSSSSS. That name better suits what I saw in the mirror. What follows is the conversation I had with myself inside my head. "Ummm, excuse me, did you know that your stretch marks have stretch marks?" "NO! But...I didn't even realize that I looked like THAT..., I mean, I know I'm fat, but what have I done to myself?" "Well, you eat too much, sometimes the wrong stuff, don't exercise, come on, you know this...you're a smart lady." "Yeah, but I'm still Carolinn....a whole lotta Carolinn though." "You've got to lose this, you've got to lose this now! For health reasons, mobility reasons, to look better, feel better...think better" Wake up call answered. Let me just say...well, fill in a bunch of your own cuss words...then I'm adding....shit. Right now, where there should be motivation, all I'm feeling is tired, frustrated and disappointed in myself. Not a good combo to start a new lifestyle and embark on a weight loss program. Then, I remembered seeing a photo of Ryan Blocker. New him when he was a kid and I first started teaching...from my home town, is a band director now... He's lost 329 pounds the last couple of years. He looks fantastic. I can do this...yes, I can!
So, again, I'm saying to myself...goodbye, fatass...hello, healthy lady! And, it starts...God help me, I do love to eat.
Hope you all are finding your inspiration for whatever you need to accomplish, and from wherever you can.
Carolinn, I can relate! Two weeks ago I joined the local YMCA.......and haven't been back to workout......on top of that, I didn't even work out the day I enrolled!!!! Not THAT is pathetic! We can both do it.......we have before........we HAVE to do it!!!! Ryan Blocker's story is amazing!!!! Good......no, GREAT for him!!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteHEY, Bernie!! I know, I know....that pathetic feeling overshadows everything for some reason when we let ourselves do stupid shit like that! BTW, everybody can see these posts!! :) Thanks for reading my blog!
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